Snakes Are Dumb.

Favorite headline of the day: “Python Gulps Queen-Size Electric Blanket.” Here’s the story if you’re interested - http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory?id=2212355 But…I have to tell you, there isn’t much too it beyond a python eating an electric blanket. Apparently he was eating his bunny rabbit dinner (L) and he confused where the bunny ended and the blanket began. Thing is, they really look pretty damn different. And don’t you think that when he got to the chord and electric box he though “hmm, this rabbit sure does have an odd texture. And he sure is crazy big and doesn’t really have any sort of flesh.” So I conclude that pythons must be pretty dumb. They are also snakes who give me the CREEPS.

Can we talk faucets for a minute? Because don’t forget that they are pretty much my life this summer. So I’m the new product development meeting yesterday. We have three new lines hitting Lowes and Home Depot this year. Right now they only have code names. I’ll give you one: Pinstripes. But I can’t give you
the others cuz then I’d have to kill you. (why do people love saying that so much??) So anyway. We are talking about these new families, and one of our VPs is like, “So, are we ever going to give these series names? I mean, Pinstripes, we obviously aren’t using that – that’s a Kohler line.” So my boss explains that he has our Marketing/Comm group working on the naming, and the woman who heads that heads the group hands him this list of names for the faucets. I strain to try and read it but cannot. So the guy is like, “Where the hell did these come from? Skylar? Ashley? These are terrible.” And the woman gets all bent out of shape and defensive about her market research techniques and it’s really kind of funny, I’m kind of wanting to laugh. The thing is, how the hell do you name a faucet? It’s this hunk of metal that spouts water, even if it is pretty. Oh – sidenote – this woman, the naming head, she is wearing sequins in the office today. I don’t think that is acceptable.

My fav comment from this conversation, which sorry if you don’t find it funny, but you have to remember that I’ve become a huge faucet nerd, was when they were talking about this one faucet. They are passing around the model, and someone is like, “This looks like Parisa on Jenny Craig.” (They also talked at length about how it resembled a woman’s silhouette…and that was weird). Anyway, someone suggested calling it Jenny Craig. That would be funny, no? If you were doing some remodeling and your friends were like, “So, which faucet are you going with?” And you’re like, “The Jenny Craig.” And they’re like, “No I’m not asking about your diet you silly! The faucet!!” Ok. I’ll stop there. Anyway, what if they just named their faucets after their summer interns? If they can have an Ashley…why not a Sara?